Hello again

I haven't written here in awhile
I've been writing elsewhere
A lot has changed
I'll have to write about it later though

Tonight I'm just here to say
That I'll be writing more here
Or at least trying
For now, I leave you.

The Setting Sun

You brightened my world
And warmed my soul
You showed me paths
I never knew I could go

I traveled so far
Under your bright gaze
An angel of fire
You set my heart ablaze

I could've stayed there forever
But you are elsewhere bound
My world is dimming
As you fall toward the ground

I could run after you
To keep you longer
Or I could watch you leave
Which would be harder?

You're growing more distant
You're changing your colors
More beautiful than ever
As you move on to others

As your light leaves my life
Your warmth stays with me
I'll always remember you
I know I had to let you free.

The Only One

Within the mix at a family party
I gazed around and easily realized
I am the odd man out now
I'm the only one
Standing alone.

It makes me sad sometimes
I'm a good guy
Who would make a woman
Extremely happy.
I'm loyal
I'm kind
I'm passionate
I'm intelligent
I'm confident
And I'll be an amazing father...
Still...
  I'm the only one
  Standing alone.

Island of Paradise

I used to see a light in your eyes
When you looked at me.
Though your eyes may still be bright
The light that I sparked is gone.

We were never more than friends
    When seen through your eyes.
Perhaps you were right to believe that
    Maybe that's all we ever were.

A future together may have been hard
Or it could've been amazing
We're at the point now
That we'll never find out.

That ship has sailed
We were marooned on that island.
It may not be what I wanted
But it's where I was left.

I can signal for the ship
And wear a disguise,
Or I can turn this piece of land
Into an island of paradise.

Emotionless

People ask me
How I keep so level headed
When it comes to my emotions.

Then I wonder how I can't.

There are times in my life
When I allow myself to get excited
To acknowledge the deep emotions
To express them and show them..

Then with rare exceptions
I have it taken from me
And I feel a hurt deeper
Than anyone understands.

I keep level headed
To protect myself.
Because it seems my emotions
Run far deeper
Than the average person.

So many people think
I don't feel those emotions.

But that's so far from the truth.

I feel too much
Too deeply.

Knowing that about myself
I continually keep my emotions in check
So I can experience life to its fullest.

Rising star

The past few months
Have been extremely difficult
I was dropped into a darkness
That left me weak and tired

Then a couple weeks ago
A new star rose above the horizon
Guiding me to a warmer place
And a better future

I'll follow this light
Out of the dark
Into a new world
Of promise and life.

Are you there?

I have become a burden
Not only to myself
But to my friends and family
It's one of the most horrible feelings

I have trouble holding back tears
They're constantly just beneath the surface
Waiting..and burning
It hurts

My bad days have dominated
My good days are harder to hold on to
I pray for guidance
I see darkness

I'm trying to break it
I'm trying hard
I won't give up
Not this time

It's taking a toll on me
I'm isolating myself
I know I shouldn't
But my strength has diminished.

....God...are you there?